You Hurt, I Hurt

Kobi

Something I've never told you is that when you would cry on the phone, I would hold it together for you and help you through, but when we would hang up, I would sob. I would cry because you were hurting and when you hurt, I hurt. Seeing you having a hard time always broke my heart. You always deserved better than this life gave you.

I would tell you that I hated to see you sad. But I truly don't think you understood the magnitude of it. Or maybe you did. Maybe you never told me that when I would cry on the phone, you cried too. Maybe we really did feel the same. Because your pain always caused me to feel nauseous, and pained. I would always do anything I could to cheer you up.

I've heard some of your friends call some of the unfortunate circumstances in your life, "Kobi luck." I thought about that for a while and I couldn't agree more. It did seem that things often went awry for you, although lately, I'm feeling that we both have that luck, or lack there of. I also have heard many say that you were the happiest person they ever met. How awesome is it that your friends knew you had a tough time with things, but they saw you persevere right through it. They saw you extending your hand to others and you sharing your smile and your laugh even though things were often not going well for you. I think it speaks volumes about your character. It says so much about the amazing, loving person that you were, Kob.

I saw more than your goofy smile though. You and I could tell by how the other said "Hey" on the phone, if we were okay or not. We knew by a Facebook post, or a song we shared, or the tone in our voices. We knew each other better than we knew ourselves. My point is, I'm hurting Kobi. Many people can't tell I'm hurting by the tone of my voice or the look in my eyes. No one is you. We always took care of each other. And someone hurt you. Someone hurt you in the worst way, and most devastating way possible. So now I'm hurting in the worst way possible. Because when you hurt, Bub, I hurt.

Take care of me please. I need you.

Sis